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Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Podcast #274: The Seven Keys to Starbug
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 22 Oct 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Crumbly, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review Big Finish’s version of the Doctor Who stage play The Seven Keys to Doomsday, the third and fourth episodes of Star Trek: Discovery and the new Red Dwarf episodes Cured and Siliconia, find some general […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #202: Babylon 5 – Phoenix Rising
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 Oct 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, roasted, in front of the Season 5 Babylon 5 episode ‘Phoenix Rising’, and spout our usual nonsense! Byron is losing control of more than his flowing locks, Garibaldi has a word with Bester and the rogue telepaths are burning bright. But enough of their […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #273: Captain Ace and a Bout of ST:D
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 08 Oct 2017 08:50

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review Big Finish’s Doctor Who: Earth Aid audio play, discuss the first two episodes of Star Trek: Discovery, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 02:01 — Welcome! 02:53 – […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #201: Doctor Who – Extremis
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 01 Oct 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, simulated, in front of the 2017 Doctor Who S10 episode, ‘Extremis’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor is doing his Daredevil impersonation, Bill has an unreal feeling and the Monks are definitely meddling. But enough of their problems, please sit down with us […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #272: Doctor Who and those Effing Nanites
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 24 Sep 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller compare TV’s Doctor Who: Dalek and Big Finish’s Doctor Who: Jubilee, play a game, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:10 — Welcome! 02:38 – News: 02:48 […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #200: Babylon 5 – In the Kingdom of the Blind
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 17 Sep 2017 12:24

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, blackmailed, in front of the Season 5 Babylon 5 episode ‘In the Kingdom of the Blind’, and spout our usual nonsense! Byron and his flowing locks are attempting some dirty blackmail, the Centauri Regent has taken to drink and Londo Mollari needs to watch […]

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Rogue Warriors

Rogue Warriors:
Season One, Episode Eight

By Andy Dunn


Around the streets of London, heavily armed policemen and British soldiers patrolled the area. Security was extremely tight around Buckingham palace and the citizens of London all looked nervous.

The Rogue Warriors were in the Prime Minister’s office and were discussing tactic situations.

“Have we heard anything from the U.N., yet?” asked Charles.

“I’ve sent a letter to them, informing about the President’s plans, two days ago” said the Prime Minister “We just need to be patient.”

“Is it really necessary to have the army patrolling London? It’s not like we’re at war!” said Vicky.

“Well, since that the Queen refuses to be moved to a High security bunker to be safe, I am not taking any chances” said the Prime Minister.

“You’re concerned that America could possible start an invasion, aren’t you sir?” asked Chucky.

“Yes, I am” said the Prime Minister “if they wanted to invade, they’ll do it without hesitation.”

“Well, don’t you worry, sir” boasted Dave “we’ll beat back those Americans with all our strength. Nothing can defeat the Rogue Warriors!”

“We’ll protect the Queen with our very lives!” said Helen.

“I believe you can” said the Prime Minister “good luck Rogue Warriors.”

*

Down at Heathrow Airport, daily routines were going round like normal. Security was tighter around the terminal gates. A cargo plane landed in a small runway. A few baggage handlers approached to take out the cargo. The cargo door then slowly opened.

American soldiers then charged out from the plane and killed the baggage handlers. A few more cargo planes arrived and unloaded more American troops. They all stormed inside the airport. They killed all the security guards and held most of the civilians’ hostage.

A smaller plane then arrived at the airport. A soldier went up to the plane.

“Area is secure, Zeus,” he said.

Zeus exited the plane and walked up to the airport.

“Excellent work, Lieutenant” He said with an evil grin.

Hundreds of hostages were kept in the main hall of the airport. Zeus entered the hall. He looked round.

“How many hostages, Lieutenant?” he asked.

“2,179, sir” said the Lieutenant.

“Good” said Zeus “We must move quickly, soldiers. It won’t be long till the British government finds out what’s going on.”

“I’ll signal the rest of the army to land, sir,” said the Lieutenant.

“Excellent” said Zeus “I want a battalion of troops to remain here to set up a staging area for reinforcements. The rest of you follow me. The President wants this city to be in under our control by the end of the week.”

*

Back at Simon’s house, the Rogue Warriors tried to relax.

“So, how’s the Prime Minister?” asked Simon.

“He’s worried,” said Charles.

“Worried?” asked Alison.

“He’s afraid that the Americans will invade London,” said Helen.

“Who wouldn’t be afraid?” asked George “You can’t even walk round London anymore without freaking out.”

“Well, London is on full alert until further notice” said Chucky.

“Anyway, you all heard the Prime Minister” stated Dave “until we here from the U.N., there’s nothing we can do.”

Suddenly, three American soldiers broke in to the house.

“GET DOWN ON THE GROUND NOW!!!” they yelled.

Everyone lay on the floor.

“Are these the Rogue Warriors, the Professor mentioned?” asked one of the soldiers.

“Professor?” said Charles.

“SHUT THE FUCK UP, MAGGOT!!!” yelled one of the soldiers.

Dave then threw a small smoke bomb at the soldiers and it engulfed them. Chucky then knocked the gun out of one of the soldiers’ hand and shot the other two. He then cornered the third soldier. The smoke cleared. The third soldier was now shaking.

“P-please. Don’t kill me,” he pleaded fearfully.

“Well, that depends” said Chucky angrily “you better us what the hell is going on here.”

“Are you here with an army?!” asked Dave.

“Y-yes,” said the soldier “We’ve invaded London, via Heathrow Airport.”

“What do you mean, via Heathrow Airport?” asked Vicky angrily.

“We captured it and are using it as a staging area” said the soldier.

“What are your plans?” asked Helen angrily.

“Oh, come on, I don’t know,” said the Soldier.

Chucky then shot him in the hand.

“ANSWER HER QUESTION. WHAT ARE YOUR PLANS?!!!” yelled Chucky.

“To infiltrate and capture Queen Elizabeth,” said the soldier tearfully and in pain.

“Is the President behind this?” asked Charles angrily.

The soldier looks at the gun.

“Y-yes” he said tearfully.

“And is Zeus leading the attack?” asked Charles angrily.

“Yes!” sobbed the soldier.

Dave then got angry.

“DAMN THAT Professor AND THE BLOODY PRESIDENT!!!” he yelled.

“We’ve got to inform the Prime Minister and protect the Queen,” said Ben.

“We’ll go and protect the Queen, you guys go and get the Prime Minister” said Charles.

“What about him?” asked Alison as pointed to the soldier.

“I’ll kill him,” said Chucky angrily.

“No, no, please,” pleaded the soldier.

Chucky ignored him and opened fire. The soldier was now dead.

“Let’s go guys. There’s no time to lose,” said Charles.

The Rogue Warriors headed for Buckingham palace. Simon, George, Alison and Ben headed for the houses of parliament.

*

Simon, George, Alison and Ben had no trouble to reach the houses of parliament.

“Huh? Funny?” said Simon.

“What is it, Simon?” asked George.

“I thought we would encounter American soldiers on the way,” said Simon.

They all entered parliament and rushed inside the Prime Ministers office.

“Mister Prime Minister?” said Alison.

“Oh I so glad you four are safe” said the Prime Minister with relief.

“You know what’s happening then, yes?” asked Ben.

“Yes Ben, I know,” said the Prime Minister “This invasion can only mean one thing. The President has declared war on Britain.”

“I take it that the U.N. has ignored the situation,” said Simon.

“I just don’t understand why they would respond to my comment,” said the Prime Minister.

“Can they be this corrupt?” asked Alison.

“It’s unthinkable,” said the Prime Minister “Anyway, where are the Rogue Warriors?”

“They’re at Buckingham palace to defend the Queen” said Simon.

“That’s very wise and noble of them” said the Prime Minister “In the mean time, we better get to my emergency bunker.”

A couple of British soldiers arrived to escorted them to the emergency bunker. The bunker contained a few high tech computers and lots of weapons and gadgets.

“This is your emergency bunker?” asked Simon.

“That’s right, Simon” said the Prime Minister “from here, I can see what is going on in the country that is to what up most importance.”

“Have Charles and the others made it to Buckingham palace, yet?” asked George.

“Well let’s have a look,” said the Prime Minister as he typed up on the computer.

The monitor screen then showed that the Rogue Warriors and the British army had took up defensive positions around Buckingham palace.

“It seems like they are ready for any combat that awaits them,” said George.

“I just hope that they can hold on for as long as they can,” said the Prime Minister

*

In London, most of the British army tried to hold the line between the Americans and the final defence around Buckingham palace. Back at Buckingham palace, fears started to rise slowly around the British army.

“Wh-what if we don’t survive this?” asked one of the soldiers fearfully.

“We’ll be ok,” said Chucky reassuringly.

“B-but, what if they use an atomic bomb?” asked another soldier.

“They want to take control of London. That’s going to be impossible if they use an a-bomb to destroy it,” said Dave.

“Just stay calm and don’t hesitate to kill any Americans you see out there,” said Charles.

A grenade was suddenly launched at them.

“TAKE COVER!!!” yelled Vicky

Most of them manage to jumped out of the way. A few British soldiers were killed in the explosion. Afterwards, the rest of them tried to reform the defensive perimeter, but the American army attempted to charge.

“OPEN FIRE!! PROTECT THE QUEEN WITH YOUR LIVES!!” yelled the British general.

The Rogue Warriors and the British army started to shoot the Americans. However, no matter how many they kill, more waves of troops kept approaching.

“It’s no good, they just keep coming!” shouted Helen.

Suddenly, another grenade was launched. The explosion killed most of the British soldiers and knocked the Rogue Warriors against the wall.

American soldiers stopped by the gates. Zeus approached.

“Entrance is clear, Zeus” said one soldier.

“Excellent work, soldier” said Zeus “Now, I want five of you to follow men and we’ll kidnap the Queen. The rest of you, go and help the rest of the army still in battle throughout London.”

“Sir, yes sir!” said the soldiers.

The Rogue Warriors got up off the floor.

“We gotta hurry. Zeus is inside the palace with a few soldiers,” said Charles.

“He’s gonna pay for this!” said Dave angrily.

They all stormed inside.

*

The Rogue Warriors were inside the palace. All of the internal guards were dead.

“I hope we’re not too late,” said Chucky.

“We better find the Queen fast,” said Vicky.

The Rogue Warriors searched every room with quick succession. They find no trace of the Queen or Zeus.

“Could this be a trap?” asked Helen.

“It feels like it, Helen,” said Charles.

Suddenly, the Queen entered the room.

“What the devil is going on here?” she asked.

The Rogue Warriors gasped.

“Your Majesty” said Dave as he knelt down.

“Who are you people?” asked the Queen.

“We’re the Rogue Warriors, Your Majesty,” said Chucky.

“Oh yes, the Prime Minister mentioned you before” said the Queen.

“Ok, With all due respect, Your Majesty. But you must come with as to a safe location.” said Vicky

“The Americans have invaded London and attempting to capture you,” explained Chucky.

“I told the Prime Minister, and I’m going to do the same to you all. I’m not going anywhere,” stated the Queen.

“But Your Majesty, Zeus is coming to remove you from the throne” said Helen.

“I am not scared and I am not intimidated by the Americans,” stated the Queen “I am staying put.”

Just then, Zeus and five American soldiers broke in the room. Zeus threw a smoke bomb at the Rogue Warriors and it engulfed them.

“Grab her, now!” he shouted.

Two more American soldiers entered the room and kidnap the Queen. The Smoke now cleared.

“Zeus, YOU’RE BECOMING A REAL PAIN IN MY ARSE!!!” yelled Dave.

Zeus chuckled.

“Well you are all too late,” stated Zeus “I have the Queen. And if you want her back, it’ll have to be on my terms.”

“Guess again, you three eyed git” said Charles.

He was about to attack Zeus until the soldiers’ swabbed all the Rogue Warriors with Chloroform. The Rogue Warriors were now unconscious.

“Tie them all together and leave them here” said Zeus.

“Yes sir” said a soldier.

Zeus headed back to Heathrow Airport with the captured Queen.

“HAHAHAHA! Soon Me and the President will take this pitiful little country and then the world!” he thought.

***

Season One, Episode Nine.