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Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Podcast #258: That Osgood and Kate Sound
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 12 Mar 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn discuss possibilities for the next Doctor on Doctor Who, review the first three Big Finish UNIT New Series boxsets, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:20 — Welcome! 01:42 – News: 02:04 — […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #257: Holistic Double Banking
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 26 Feb 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller discuss BBC America/Netflix’s ‘Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency’ and Douglas Adams’ time on Doctor Who, play some games, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:20 — Welcome! 02:14 – No news […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #256: The Double Whammy
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 12 Feb 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller discuss Peter Capaldi’s departure from Doctor Who and the legend that was John Hurt, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:25 — Welcome! 02:09 – News: 02:20 […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #255: The Six Idiots
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 29 Jan 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review the Big Finish Doctor Who boxset ‘Classic Doctors, New Monsters: Vol. 1’ and Sherlock Series 4, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:35 — Welcome! 02:49 […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #254: Bad Awakenings
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 Jan 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and the Keith Dunn review the 1966 Doctor Who story ‘The Power of the Daleks’ and the 2016 film ‘Passengers’, say what we’ve been up to recently, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:14 — Welcome! 02:18 – […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #189: Doctor Who – The Return of Doctor Mysterio
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 08 Jan 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, supered, in front of the 2016 Doctor Who Christmas special, ‘The Return of Doctor Mysterio’, and spout our usual nonsense! This Doctor is desperate to get Amy back, the Ghost has a baby to monitor and Lucy is channelling Lois Lane. But enough of […]

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Rogue Warriors

Rogue Warriors:
Season Two, Episode Three

By Andy Dunn


The Enterprise flew through space at half impulse power. Simon, Cathy, Carol and the Rogue warriors were in the bridge of the ship.

“There we go. The ship is now on autopilot” stated Chucky as he worked on a station.

“Can you show us around now?” asked Dave.

“Certainly” said Chucky.

They all approached Chucky as he began the tour.

“Well, here in the bridge, you have helm control, a few science stations, the captains chair and weapons control,” explained Chucky.

Dave’s eyes then light up.

“Weapons control?” he asked excitedly.

“Yes, Dave. And yes, you can be stationed there” stated Chucky.

“Wow, thanks, Chucky. You’re a good friend you know that?” asked Dave as he took his station.

Chucky then sighed.

“Anyway, me and Charles have discussed this for weeks and we decided that he should be captain” stated Chucky whilst he pointed at Charles.

“Huh, typical” mumbled Dave.

“What’s that supposed to mean, Dave?” asked Charles as he took the captains chair.

“Well, It isn’t fair, because the leader always gets the captains chair!” exaggerated Dave.

“Well get used to it!” snapped Charles.

Dave just stood still and frowned.

“What about the rest of us?” asked Vicky.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got stations for the rest of you as well” stated Chucky.

“Are they all on the bridge?” asked Helen.

“Yes, of course” said Chucky as he showed it to them.

“What else is there on this ship?” asked Simon.

“We have the engine room, crew quarters, a cargo bay, an observation room, an armoury and a hanger bay where the fighters are,” explained Chucky.

“You’ve really outdone yourselves with this ship, guys” praised Cathy.

“Thanks. It took us years of work to build this thing,” said Chucky.

“Yeah. I nearly broke my back a couple of times in the process,” stated Charles.

Suddenly, the alarm sounded.

“What’s going on?” asked Carol.

“I don’t know. Chucky, check the sensors” ordered Charles.

Chucky searched through his station.

“I’m not picking up anything near us,” he said.

“Is there anything wrong with the Enterprise?” asked Vicky.

“Let me check,” said Simon as he searched through his station.

Simon then was shocked after he found out the problem.

“We’re low on fuel,” he said.

The others then gasped.

“How can we be low on fuel?” asked Helen.

“Oh bugger! I forgot to load up on emergency fuel and other supplies,” stated Chucky.

“WHAT?!” yelled Dave.

Everyone then frowned at Chucky.

“I’m sorry, but we took off into space too quickly,” stated Chucky.

“Yeah, and thanks to you, we’re gonna be stranded in space for the rest of our lives!” shouted Vicky angrily.

“No, we’re not,” said Simon as he looked through his station.

“Why not?” asked Carol.

“Because, sensors a picking a space dock near our location,” stated Simon.

“Do you think we’ll be able to get there in time?” asked Helen.

“I believe we can before we run out of fuel,” said Simon.

“Well, it looks like we have no choice. Simon, set coarse for the space dock,” ordered Charles.

“Yes, sir” said Simon.

Charles then smiled.

“I could get used to being the captain of the Enterprise,” he smirked.

“Sure. Once we shave your head bald, then you can be Jean-Luc Picard himself,” joked Dave.

Everyone except Cathy and Carol started to laugh.

“What the hell are you talking about?” asked Cathy.

“Ah. It’s just a T.V. show we used to watch back on Earth,” stated Simon.

“Yeah, don’t worry about it” said Chucky.

Cathy and Carol looked even more confused.

“These are definitely strange creatures,” said Carol.

*

A few minutes later, The Enterprise managed to dock with the space dock.

“Welcome to space dock 737. Enjoy your stay here,” said the audio service as they entered the dock.

“Huh? That’s kind of a nice welcome,” said Carol.

They all entered the main hall of the dock and could see other alien races as they did what looked like some shopping. The group looked surprised.

“What the hell is this place?” asked Dave.

“This looks like a shopping centre of some sort,” guessed Cathy.

“Shopping centre?” asked Vicky as her eye lightened up.

The group turned towards Vicky.

“Oh no, not again” said Chucky whilst he covered his eyes.

Vicky was prepared to start to rush towards the stores.

“Hold her back, quick!” shouted Simon.

The Rogue Warriors then held down Vicky.

“Hey! Let go of me!” shouted Vicky as she tried to struggle.

Cathy and Carol looked on confusingly.

“This is no time to go shopping for new clothes, Vicky,” said Charles.

“We only came here for fuel and supplies,” stated Helen.

“But I only want to look for valuable supplies” stated Vicky.

“Yeah, those supplies being new cloths to attract Charles,” stated Chucky.

“WOULD YOU SHUT UP YOU CAT EARED FREAK!!” yelled Vicky.

Everyone then stared at them.

“Look, this is no time to be fighting each other,” lectured Cathy.

“The more time we waste here, the more planets the Metrolians will conquer,” lectured Carol.

Vicky then got up and paused.

“You’re right, Carol. I’m sorry,” said Vicky.

“Good. Now, lets just get the things we need and get going,” stated Carol.

They all then found a refuelling store.

“Welcome to my store. Are you looking for anything specific?” asked the owner.

“We need to refuel our ship and stock up on emergency supplies,” stated Charles.

“Ah, then look no further,” said the owner as he showed them round the store “Because I have more than enough fuel that can get your ship to the neighbouring galaxies” he went on.

“Great!” said Helen happily.

“Wait a minute! What’s the catch?” asked Dave cautiously.

“There is no catch. I never lie about my products, sir. I own the best fuelling system in the galaxy,” explained the owner.

“Ok fine, we’ll take it,” said Chucky.

“Excellent choice, sir. You will not be disappointed, I can assure you,” stated the owner.

The storeowner was about to insert the fuel within the Enterprise, but then stopped.

“Now then, before I can put the fuel into your ship, I must know, how are you going to pay for this?” asked the owner.

The group then looked at each other. The storeowner then got impatient.

“You do have money, don’t you?” he asked impatiently.

Simon then stepped up.

“I have about £1,500 in cash” he said.

“Pounds? Earth money?” asked the owner.

“Yes” said Simon.

“What do you think this is, the dark ages?” asked the owner angrily.

“What do you mean?” asked Helen.

“We do not accept Earth money out here. If you have some real money, then you can have the fuel” stated the owner.

“But we don’t have anything else and our ship hardly has any fuel left,” stated Charles.

“Well, I guess your stuck here then” gloated the owner.

*

A few minutes later, another ship docked with the space dock.

“Welcome to space dock 737. Enjoy your stay here,” said the audio service.

The group are sat on benches as they pondered on what to do.

“It was all just a waste of time. Me and Cathy, shouldn’t have got our hopes up when you agreed to help us in the war” stated Carol angrily.

“Don’t say that, Carol. We’ll think of something, won’t we guys?” asked Simon.

“I don’t think there’s anything we can do,” stated Charles.

“It looks like we are stuck here,” said Dave.

Suddenly, Zeus entered the area with his guards.

“Spread out men, take control of this space dock!” he ordered.

“Yes, sir!” said his guards.

“Zeus is here,” said Vicky.

“What!” shouted Dave.

Zeus then walked up to the Rogue Warriors.

“Hello again, Rogue Warriors! What are you doing out here in the far reaches of space?” he asked.

“Never mind us. What the hell are YOU doing out here!?” asked Simon angrily.

“I’m gonna do what I do best” said Zeus.

“What? Have all your men killed and then get beaten to a bloody pulp by us?” asked Dave angrily.

“What! How dare you insult me like that!” shouted Zeus.

“Oh, put a sock in it, horn boy!” shouted Chucky.

“GUARDS, KILL THEM!!!” yelled Zeus.

Zeus’s guards then charged at the group. Dave, Charles and Simon attempted to fight them off, whilst Chucky, Vicky, Helen, Cathy and Carol ran back into the Enterprise.

“That’s the man you saved back at your planet!” stated Cathy in shock.

“Who the hell is he?” asked Carol as she tried to catch her breath.

“That was Professor Zeus,” stated Helen.

“We had been fighting him back on our planet for a few years” explained Vicky.

“Why have you been fighting him?” asked Cathy.

“Because he intends to take control of our planet,” explained Chucky.

“Then why is he following us?” asked Cathy.

“That’s a good question,” said Vicky.

“Maybe he wishes to kill us,” suggested Helen.

“Or maybe he wants to take as much of the universe as he can” stated Carol.

“I sincerely hope not,” said Cathy.

“Whatever his intentions are, they can’t be good,” stated Chucky.

Vicky then went into the locker room and came out with some guns.

“Here, girls, Chucky” she said whilst giving the guns to them.

“What do we need these for?” asked Carol.

“We’re going to kill the guards and rescue everyone in the space dock,” stated Vicky.

“But, we need to find a way out of here and stop the Metrolians” stated Carol.

“Zeus can just as bad as the Metrolians, Carol. If we don’t stop him, he could take control of the universe,” explained Helen.

They all then paused for a second.

“You’re right, Helen. Lets do this!” said Cathy with determination in her eyes.

They all then returned inside the space dock and started to open fire on Zeus’s Guards.

Zeus then headed deeper into the space dock.

“We better stop Zeus before he stirs up more trouble” stated Dave.

“You’re right, Dave. Simon, Chucky, come with me. The rest of you stay here and make sure the other aliens are alright,” ordered Charles.

“No problem, Charles” said Dave.

Simon, Charles and Chucky then went off to search for Zeus.

*

Zeus eventually found himself in an office. An alien stepped up to him angrily.

“Who are you and what do you think you’re doing, rushing into my office like that?” he asked angrily.

“Are you the owner of this space dock?” asked Zeus.

“Yes! And what do you think you’re doing here?” asked the owner angrily.

Zeus then produced an evil grin.

“I’m here to kidnap you and take over this space dock,” he stated.

“OVER MY DEAD BODY, YOU WILL!!” yelled the owner.

“Very well, if you want it that way” said Zeus as he pulled out his gun.

Before Zeus was about to shoot the owner, Simon, Chucky, and Charles burst into the room. Simon then shot the gun out of Zeus’s hand.

Charles then Charged at Zeus and knocked him to the desk.

“CALL YOUR MEN OFF NOW!!!” yelled Charles.

Zeus now trembled with fear.

“Ok, I’ll call them off” he said fearfully.

“There’s no need. They’re all dead,” said Chucky.

“WHAT!?” yelled Zeus.

“All of your men are dead again, Professor” stated Simon.

Charles then got off the desk and helped Zeus up.

“Go back home, Professor, and stay out of this conflict between us and the Metrolian Empire,” ordered Charles angrily.

After a few seconds, Zeus quickly ran back to his spaceship and left the space dock.

The owner then approached Simon, Chucky and Charles.

“You’re fighting the Metrolian Empire?” he asked.

“Yeah. But until we get more fuel and supplies for our ship or we not going anywhere” stated Chucky.

“Well, for saving my space dock and the lives of innocent people today, you can have that stuff for free” stated the owner generously.

Simon’s, Charles and Chucky’s eyes then lit up.

“Hey, thanks mate. This means a lot to us” said Charles.

“No problem. In fact, whenever you need to re-supply or refuel, feel free to come by and you can have it done, free of charge” offered the owner.

“Oh, brilliant!” said Chucky happily.

*

Dave, Vicky, Helen, Cathy and Carol started to check if any aliens were hurt during the gunfight.

Simon, Charles and Chucky entered the area with the space dock owner.

“Hey guys, we’re back,” said Simon.

“Charles, you’re safe,” said Vicky as she hugged him.

“Did you manage to stop Zeus?” asked Helen.

“Yep. He hightailed it outta here,” said Chucky.

“He should be back on our planet by now” stated Charles.

“That’s good. But we’re still stuck here” said Cathy.

“Not anymore, Cathy. Because the space dock owner is rewarding us with extra fuel and supplies for saving his space dock” explained Simon.

“Really?” asked Carol as she got her hopes up.

“Yep. He’s even letting us use this space dock as a supply base whenever we need it” explained Chucky.

“Excellent. Now we can get some really valuable supplies for our journey” stated Vicky happily.

Dave then sighed.

“For the last time, Vicky. New clothes do not count as valuable supplies! We should be using this place to collect weapons and other cool gadgets,” he stated as he posed.

“You’d do anything just to pose around, Dave” said Charles.

“I’m not posing,” said Dave.

“Yes you are. You look like a total tit when you do that” stated Charles.

The others began to laugh.

“Oh, shut up, guys. It’s not funny!” said Dave angrily.

***

Season Two, Episode Four.