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Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Podcast #261: Of Companions and Pilots
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sat, 22 Apr 2017 17:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Jean Riddler, Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review the 2017 Doctor Who episode ‘The Pilot’ and discuss what makes a Doctor Who companion, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 02:29 — Welcome! 02:21 – News: 02:36 — Star Trek: Discovery narrowly avoids Worf. 04:41 […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #260: Masterfully Unbound
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 09 Apr 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review the 2016 Big Finish Doctor Who boxset ‘The New Adventures of Bernice Summerfield, Vol. 3 – The Unbound Universe’ and discuss Doctor Who’s The Master in general, play a game, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #259: British Robots Invasion of Earth 2150AD
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 26 Mar 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review the 1966 film Daleks – Invasion Earth: 2150 A.D. and the 2017 film The Lego Batman Movie, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:15 — Welcome! 02:01 – News: 02:20 […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #258: That Osgood and Kate Sound
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 12 Mar 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn discuss possibilities for the next Doctor on Doctor Who, review the first three Big Finish UNIT New Series boxsets, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:20 — Welcome! 01:42 – News: 02:04 — […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #257: Holistic Double Banking
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 26 Feb 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller discuss BBC America/Netflix’s ‘Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency’ and Douglas Adams’ time on Doctor Who, play some games, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:20 — Welcome! 02:14 – No news […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #256: The Double Whammy
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 12 Feb 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller discuss Peter Capaldi’s departure from Doctor Who and the legend that was John Hurt, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:25 — Welcome! 02:09 – News: 02:20 […]

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News of the Universes Alf Roland

By Alf Roland
Chief Pan-Universal Correspondent

Father Christmas Exposed Christmas: Who's the Master now?

The shocking truth of Father Christmas was revealed yesterday when a source close to the festive icon disclosed the latest criminal act, and more besides.

It has long been a speculated how Father Christmas manages to visit so many millions of homes each year in the space of about 24 hours. Magic is the generally accepted truth and The News of the Universes can exclusively confirm this to be the case and tell the world that Father Christmas is actually an ancient god.

String of Aliases
Bad god Father Christmas has a long history of altering his name and appearance to flee from the law. His first known appearance was as risqué pagan god Woden, known for distributing his filthy gifts in mid-winter. The next recorded sighting was as St. Nicholas, baby eating Bishop of Myra who wormed his way into becoming the patron saint of children (not to be confused with St. Michael, the patron saint of underwear). Reports of St. Nicholas' visits to Holland include the figure known only as Black Peter, who would accompany Father Christmas and torture naughty children and politicians (though the latter are known to have enjoyed the depraved acts). Other known aliases include Sinta Class, Kriss Kringle, Santa Claus and Gary Glitter.

Old Nic
Faced with a population that is rapidly increasing beyond the six billion mark, Father Christmas was allegedly having trouble coping. Even his army of Rent-a-Santa agents planted at every shopping centre in the western world, ready to take over when the time is right, are not enough.

"It's been a nightmare!" said a source close to Christmas who wished to keep her anonymity. "Last year we missed out George W. Bush and look what it did to him!"

In a desperate bid to regain control of the festive period Father Christmas has found a new way to beat the clock - with a stolen TARDIS.

The New Daddy
Former owner of the TARDIS, a renegade Time Lord previously known as The Master, has found himself, in all fifteen incarnations, the unwilling slave of Christmas.

"Who's the Master now? It's me, big bad Father Christmas." the tyrannical festive plumper is reported as saying, before finishing with "Christmas is going to make you his bitch!"

Our inside source at the Lapland cave hide-out in the Korvatunturi mountains says this of the day: "I've haven't seen him this happy since he enslaved the elven people! We certainly got through a lot of whips that year!"

Glue Factory
With no need for his trusty old reindeer Christmas has taken up recycling in a typically brutal fashion - he certainly won't need to buy sellotape for a while. A glut of mounted reindeer heads has caused widespread panic in taxidermy circles. Phil Stiff of the Association of Taxidermists comments: "If these prices keep dropping we're going to be stuffed."

Horn of Plenty
With his new association with the Master, perhaps even more shocking than his deal in the 1950's with one time cocaine peddlers Coca Cola, Christmas has hinted to the universe his true intentions. Insiders suggest he is planning to make the world economy collapse and cause the earth to fill up with tacky gifts and killer plastic trees.