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Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Commentary #202: Babylon 5 – Phoenix Rising
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 Oct 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, roasted, in front of the Season 5 Babylon 5 episode ‘Phoenix Rising’, and spout our usual nonsense! Byron is losing control of more than his flowing locks, Garibaldi has a word with Bester and the rogue telepaths are burning bright. But enough of their […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #273: Captain Ace and a Bout of ST:D
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 08 Oct 2017 08:50

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review Big Finish’s Doctor Who: Earth Aid audio play, discuss the first two episodes of Star Trek: Discovery, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 02:01 — Welcome! 02:53 – […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #201: Doctor Who – Extremis
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 01 Oct 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, simulated, in front of the 2017 Doctor Who S10 episode, ‘Extremis’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor is doing his Daredevil impersonation, Bill has an unreal feeling and the Monks are definitely meddling. But enough of their problems, please sit down with us […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #272: Doctor Who and those Effing Nanites
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 24 Sep 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller compare TV’s Doctor Who: Dalek and Big Finish’s Doctor Who: Jubilee, play a game, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:10 — Welcome! 02:38 – News: 02:48 […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #200: Babylon 5 – In the Kingdom of the Blind
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 17 Sep 2017 12:24

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, blackmailed, in front of the Season 5 Babylon 5 episode ‘In the Kingdom of the Blind’, and spout our usual nonsense! Byron and his flowing locks are attempting some dirty blackmail, the Centauri Regent has taken to drink and Londo Mollari needs to watch […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #271: That Derby Aroma
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 10 Sep 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller recount their time at the recent Whooverville 9 Doctor Who convention, talk about media we’ve been consuming, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:30 — Welcome! 03:26 – News: 03:34 — […]

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News of the Universes Alf Roland

By Alf Roland
Chief Pan-Universal Correspondent

Archer Banged Up Jeffrey and Jonathan Archer

Time travelling Starfleet moralist, Captain Jonathan Archer, has been duped by disgraced former Tory, 'Lord' Jeffrey Archer, into taking his place in prison.

Captain Archer's part in the Temporal War now looks at an end after a fateful meeting between himself and possible ancestor Jeffrey Archer. The British novelist, Tory activist and convicted purgurist somehow convinced the gullible Starfleet Captain into believing his two cell mates were enemy agents in the time war.

STUNNED
Captain Archer further compounded his error by agreeing to stun the prison guards long enough to swap his uniform for liar Jeffrey Archer's prison garb. Eye witness reports tell of how Captain Archer was then whacked over the side of the head with a fire extinguisher and dumped in Jeffrey's cell.

MUPPET
A rude awakening was in store for Captain Archer, trapped with two ex-kids tv presenters from Rainbow, George and Zippy. The puppet duo were thrown in the slammer earlier this year for the brutal murder of co-star talking bear Bungle, whose pelt they sold to big name fan of the kids tv series Roy Skelton. Partly in reference to the fact that they only have one arm, the twosome, one a pink hippo and the other an orange creature who had a zip sown into his mouth for dubious air deprivation stimulation, are known around the Belmarsh high security prison as the One Armed Bandits.

BUGGERED
Other prisoners have exclusively told the News of the Universes how for the rest of that afternoon all they could hear were echoing cries from Archer's cell, "Ow, Jeffrey!", being repeated over and over. Jonathan Archer is understood not to have left his prison cell since. His two cell mates venture out only long enough to smuggle back food for the three of them. Captain Archer is known to have a history with several aliens, including a female Vulcan and a shape shifting alien of unknown gender. As a senior Starfleet officer Archer has also had extensive training on how to be captured and thrown into dank dungeons. It would appear that any similar knowledge on how to break out has alluded him this time.

FAKED
Various reports are coming in from across the timeline that suggest Jeffrey Archer has convinced the crew of the USS Enterprise (NX-01) that he is a Starfleet captain, perhaps even Jonathan Archer himself, and they are now running amok and dining at the best restaurants throughout time.