Recent Blog Entries

Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Podcast #306: Seasonal Ranking
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 13 Jan 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Jean Riddler and Keith Dunn discuss the 2019 Doctor Who New Year’s Special, rank the eleven ‘New Who’ Doctor Who series, play a game, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:40 — Welcome! 02:14 – News: 02:25 — […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #221: Doctor Who – The Tsuranga Conundrum
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 06 Jan 2019 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, hospitalised, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode, ‘The Tsuranga Conundrum’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor isn’t feeling herself, Yaz needs to kick the monster and Graham has become a doula. But enough of their problems, please sit down with us […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #305: Annual Judgement
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 30 Dec 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn discuss Doctor Who Series 11, play some games, come up with our Predictions, Hopes and Dreams, and Fears for 2019, see how wrong we were about our Predictions for 2018, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #220: Doctor Who – Arachnids in the UK
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 23 Dec 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, scuttling, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode ‘Arachnids in the UK’, and spout our usual nonsense! Yaz finally gets some development, Robertson trumps nobody and the Doctor must be getting tired of giant spiders. But enough of their problems, please sit down […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #304: The Battle of Rancid Old Koalas
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 16 Dec 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn discuss two Doctor Who stories: It Takes You Away and The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos, pull some Christmas crackers, play a game, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #219: Doctor Who – Rosa
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 09 Dec 2018 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, segregated, in front of the 2018 Doctor Who episode, ‘Rosa’, and spout our usual nonsense! Ryan is feeling the sting of history, Graham doesn’t want to be there and the Doctor cannot stop this injustice. But enough of their problems, please sit down with […]

The Cre'at Club

Mr. Dalek at the Eurovision Song Contest

Leaking from the mind of Martinus Scriblerus


You can also listen to the Narrated Mr. Dalek at the Eurovision Song Contest as Ogg Vorbis (661 KB) or MP3 (715 KB).

"Know your enemy," thought Mr Dalek as he settled in front of the television on Saturday night.

"And now instead of our usual programmes we have the Eurovision Song Contest," said the announcer.

"We'll see about that," thought Mr Dalek as he elevated and set off for Belgrade. Moments later he swooped down on the concert hall and zapped Terry Wogan. Next he zapped the judges with a cry of "Null points!" Hovering through the dressing rooms he zapped each act in turn before finishing off with the orchestra and dancers. Mr Dalek left the concert hall, pausing only to zap Terry Wogan again on the way out. "That's for having two Doctors on your telethon last year!" he shouted, and zapped him once more for luck.

At zapper point Mr Dalek explained to the BBC technician that he wouldn't be getting anything more from Belgrade and that this would be an ideal opportunity to show 'Silence in the Library'. "While you're at it you might as well set up the next episode to follow. I hate waiting all week for a two-parter."

Mr Dalek flew home as fast as he could and settled in front or the television again. A rather nervous announcer came on. "Because of the unusual events in Belgrade we are unable to bring you the Eurovision Song Contest tonight. Instead we have a treat for Doctor Who fans: a double episode featuring your favourite Time Lord in 'The Daleks of Manhattan'."

Mr Dalek thought for a moment then zapped his television.

The End

Mr. Dalek