Recent Blog Entries

Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Commentary #215: Doctor Who – Twice Upon a Time
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 Apr 2018 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, regenerating, in front of the 2017 Doctor Who Christmas special, ‘Twice Upon a Time’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor is trying to hold back his explosive energies, another Doctor is also trying to hold it back and pretty much everyone else is […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #286: Encounters with Brian
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 08 Apr 2018 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn discuss Big Finish’s UNIT: Encounters boxset and Monty Python’s Life of Brian, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:27 — Welcome! 02:21 – News: 02:41 — Doctor Who: Lady […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #214: Babylon 5 – Objects at Rest
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 01 Apr 2018 09:16

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, preparing, in front of the penultimate Babylon 5 episode ‘Objects at Rest’, and spout our usual nonsense! Lennier turns his back on Sheridan, Mollari offers his final gift and Garibaldi assembles a group of troublemakers. But enough of their problems, please sit down with […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #285: A Lady, a Panther and Eldrad…
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 25 Mar 2018 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith and the Real Keith Dunn discuss Big Finish’s Doctor Who audio plays Eldrad Must Die! and The Lady of Mercia, review the Marvel film Black Panther, play a game, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:31 […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #213: Doctor Who – The Doctor Falls
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 18 Mar 2018 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, sieged, in front of the 2017 Doctor Who S10 finale, ‘The Doctor Falls’, and spout our usual nonsense! The Doctor needs to carried, Bill has a body image issue and Nardole thinks he’s in the A-Team. But enough of their problems, please sit down […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #284: Staggerers Assembled
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 11 Mar 2018 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, a miming Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller discuss Big Finish’s UNIT: Assembled boxset and Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency, Season 2, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 02:03 — Welcome! 03:08 – News: […]

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The Cre'at Club

Mr. Dalek at the Eurovision Song Contest

Leaking from the mind of Martinus Scriblerus


You can also listen to the Narrated Mr. Dalek at the Eurovision Song Contest as Ogg Vorbis (661 KB) or MP3 (715 KB).

"Know your enemy," thought Mr Dalek as he settled in front of the television on Saturday night.

"And now instead of our usual programmes we have the Eurovision Song Contest," said the announcer.

"We'll see about that," thought Mr Dalek as he elevated and set off for Belgrade. Moments later he swooped down on the concert hall and zapped Terry Wogan. Next he zapped the judges with a cry of "Null points!" Hovering through the dressing rooms he zapped each act in turn before finishing off with the orchestra and dancers. Mr Dalek left the concert hall, pausing only to zap Terry Wogan again on the way out. "That's for having two Doctors on your telethon last year!" he shouted, and zapped him once more for luck.

At zapper point Mr Dalek explained to the BBC technician that he wouldn't be getting anything more from Belgrade and that this would be an ideal opportunity to show 'Silence in the Library'. "While you're at it you might as well set up the next episode to follow. I hate waiting all week for a two-parter."

Mr Dalek flew home as fast as he could and settled in front or the television again. A rather nervous announcer came on. "Because of the unusual events in Belgrade we are unable to bring you the Eurovision Song Contest tonight. Instead we have a treat for Doctor Who fans: a double episode featuring your favourite Time Lord in 'The Daleks of Manhattan'."

Mr Dalek thought for a moment then zapped his television.

The End

Mr. Dalek