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Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Podcast #276: Whittaker Calling Orson
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 19 Nov 2017 09:15

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith and the Real Keith Dunn discuss Doctor Who subjects such as the Thirteenth Doctor’s costume, the 60s and 70s composer Dudley Simpson and director Paddy Russell, review the second season of Stranger Things, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #204: Babylon 5 – And All My Dreams, Torn Asunder
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 12 Nov 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, inquiring, in front of the Season 5 Babylon 5 episode ‘And All My Dreams, Torn Asunder’, and spout our usual nonsense! Mollari is feeling left out, Lennier has some hot footage and G’Kar wants to guard Londo’s body. But enough of their problems, please […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #275: Business is Business
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 05 Nov 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review Big Finish’s version of the Doctor Who stage play The Ultimate Adventure, the fifth and sixth episodes of Star Trek: Discovery and the new Red Dwarf episode Timewave, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #203 Doctor Who – The Pyramid at the End of the World
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 29 Oct 2017 10:00

Summary: The Doctor is trapped in an even more artificial situation than last week, Bill considers the meaning of consent and the Monks have gained god-like powers in the real world. But enough of their problems, please sit down with us to enjoy The Pyramid at the End of the World… Vital Links: Staggering Stories. […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #274: The Seven Keys to Starbug
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 22 Oct 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Crumbly, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Scott Fuller review Big Finish’s version of the Doctor Who stage play The Seven Keys to Doomsday, the third and fourth episodes of Star Trek: Discovery and the new Red Dwarf episodes Cured and Siliconia, find some general […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #202: Babylon 5 – Phoenix Rising
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 Oct 2017 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, roasted, in front of the Season 5 Babylon 5 episode ‘Phoenix Rising’, and spout our usual nonsense! Byron is losing control of more than his flowing locks, Garibaldi has a word with Bester and the rogue telepaths are burning bright. But enough of their […]

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Buccaneer Chronicles

The Buccaneer Chronicles:
Vampire Mutations

By Karen Dunn (Despite Interference by Keith Dunn, Andy Simpkins, Adam J Purcell and Tony Gallichan)


Chapter Fourteen - The Computer

 

“Password”

"I have seen Macfadyan argue with the Ship when it fails to live up to his expectations. I have seen Captain Curtis thump the food machine when it serves him egg salad instead of the requested tea and crumpets. I have seen Blanche glare at the console when it beeps at her and makes her jump. I have seen all these things and heard them all say the same thing with varying degrees of venom but this is the first time I have ever understood what 'bloody machine' means.”

* You are familiar with me - a password is unnecessary. *

“Password”

Cre'at sighed and wasted a valuable second meeting the machine's request.

“Greetings, Cre'at”

* Greetings. I require your assistance. *

“Ready.”

* Three point seven two kilometres to the east is a Ship. You must make contact. *

“Done.”

* Excellent. *

“It is a very rude machine.”

* I am aware of this. *

“Why would a construction of such high quality use a term such as 'butt out'?”

* My apologies - Blanche has become fond of American soap operas and some of the terms have corrupted the Ship's vocal systems *

“You should repair it - it is most unbecoming.”

* I shall endeavour to do so. *

“Acceptable.”

* Are you able to access the Ship's defence systems? *

“A password is required.”

Cre'at sighed: * The password is 'fluffy'. *

“In what way?”

* You misunderstand. The password is 'fluffy'. *

“But...”

* Just tell it 'fluffy'! *

“Access granted. You should also repair the password generator. Such misunderstandings could prove troublesome.”

* I am aware of this, also. I shall suggest changes. *

“Also acceptable. Instructions?”

* A forcefield is required. It must cover the area from the Ship to include the town. It must exceed the height of the trees. Maximum strength. *

“Done.”

* Excellent. Maintain the forcefield until otherwise instructed. *

“Naturally.”

* Bloody machine... *

Leaving the Psych-comp to its task, Cre'at left the house and zipped back through the trees towards the town.

***

The Tower

Vampire Mutations: Chapter Fifteen