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Staggering Stories Podcast #338: The Chronic Hysteresis Edition
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 05 Apr 2020 08:00

Summary: Apologies for the poor audio quality in this first lockdown episode. Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn review the animated release of Doctor Who: The Faceless ones and discuss the first season of Star Trek: Picard, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #234: Doctor Who – Praxeus
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 29 Mar 2020 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Keith Dunn and Steven Clare sit down, plasticed, in front of 2020 Doctor Who episode ‘Praxeus’, and spout our usual nonsense! Yaz is teleporting before thinking, Ryan gets a pat down, Sam Bishop is undercover as Jake and the Doctor has split up. But enough of their problems, please […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #337: Making a Horse Sick
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 22 Mar 2020 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Steven Clare look back at Doctor Who: Series 12 (2020), talk about their time at the Doctor Who: The Talons of Weng Chiang event at the BFI Southbank, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #233: Doctor Who – Fugitive of the Judoon
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 Mar 2020 19:05

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Keith Dunn and Steven Clare sit down, buried, in front of 2020 Doctor Who episode ‘Fugitive of the Judoon’, and spout our usual nonsense! Ruth is failing to talk about the past, the fam are conveniently scooped out of the main plot and the Doctor’s mind is blown. But […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #336: The Timeless Podcasters
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 08 Mar 2020 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Steven Clare review Doctor Who: Ascension of the Cybermen and The Timeless Children, talk about their time at Gallifrey One, get out of a Doctor Who Escape Room, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #232: Doctor Who – Nikola Telsa’s Night of Terror
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 01 Mar 2020 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell and Keith Dunn sit down, shocked, in front of 2020 Doctor Who episode ‘Nikola Telsa’s Night of Terror’, and spout our usual nonsense! Tesla is besieged by aliens, the Skithra make the Racnoss look convincing and the Doctor has met a like-mind. But enough of their problems, please sit down with […]

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Doctor Who Logo

Doctor Who: Song of the Cybermats

By 'John Smith'


 

Chorus
Cybermats come out to-night
Cybermats come one come all:
The Cybermen's edict bids them fight
Cybermats come to the Cyber Cabal.

1.
Cybermats are quick and silver,
Cybermats are rather smart;
Cybermats are weapons that deliver,
and across the floor unseen they dart.
Cybermats have shiny faces,
Cybermats have bright glowing eyes;
they are clockwork killers of inferior races
And wait for the best circumstance to arise.

2.
Cybermats are rather lowly,
Cybermats are not too big;
Cybermats are roly-poly,
They know how to stun and garrotte and gig.
Until the Cyber order they hear
They make their toilette and take their repose:
Cybermats listen with the tiniest ear,
Cybermats watch being keen to dispose.

3.
Cybermats are silver and black,
Cybermats are of moderate size;
Cybermats jump like a jumping-jack,
Cybermats have 40 watt eyes.
They're quiet enough disabling scanners,
They're quiet enough where-ever they stray,
Renewing their ever-so internecine powers
by tapping direct to your solar array.

4.
Cybermats are plastic and light,
Cybermats (as I said) are small;
If it happens to be a stormy night
They will practise a murder or two in the hall.
If it happens the sun is shining bright
You would say there is nothing amiss in the wall:
They are resting and saving themselves to be right
For the Cybermen and the Cyber Cabal.