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Staggering Stories Podcast #393: Ncuti Gatwa Goes Fourteenth
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 May 2022 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith and the Real Keith Dunn discuss the recent Doctor Who casting of Ncuti Gatwa, review Star Trek: Picard season two, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:23 — Welcome! 02:08 – News: 02:13 — Doctor Who: […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #392: Swashing Sea Demons
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 01 May 2022 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Steven Clare review the Doctor Who 2022 Easter Special – Legend of the Sea Devils, recount their time at Back to the Future: The Musical and Doctor Who: Time Fracture, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #391: Capitol Bubbling
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 17 Apr 2022 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, the Real Keith Dunn and Steven Clare review the 2022 films The Adam Project and The Bubble, recount their time at the recent Capitol 5 Doctor Who convention, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:04 — […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #390: Charley and the Crime Travellers
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 03 Apr 2022 08:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler, the Real Keith Dunn and Steven Clare review Doctor Who: Charlotte Pollard – The Further Adventuress and the 1997 BBC TV series Crime Traveller, find some general news, and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 01:01 — Welcome! 02:59 – News: […]


Staggering Stories Podcast #389: Covidian Clip Show
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 20 Mar 2022 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith and the Real Keith Dunn present clips, featuring themselves and Andy Simpkins, Jean Riddler and Scott Fuller, from old podcasts. Whilst we recover from a podcast spread Covid we look at old news for New Mutants and casting reactions for Doctor Who, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. […]


Staggering Stories Commentary #246: Doctor Who – Eve of the Daleks
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Mon, 14 Mar 2022 09:00

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, stored, in front of 2022 Doctor Who New Year’s episode ‘Eve of the Daleks’, and spout our usual nonsense! Nick is not a Dalek, Jeff loses his junk, Sarah is definitely being stalked and the Doctor and Yaz have a moment. But enough of […]

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Doctor Who Logo

Doctor Who: Song of the Cybermats

By 'John Smith'


 

Chorus
Cybermats come out to-night
Cybermats come one come all:
The Cybermen's edict bids them fight
Cybermats come to the Cyber Cabal.

1.
Cybermats are quick and silver,
Cybermats are rather smart;
Cybermats are weapons that deliver,
and across the floor unseen they dart.
Cybermats have shiny faces,
Cybermats have bright glowing eyes;
they are clockwork killers of inferior races
And wait for the best circumstance to arise.

2.
Cybermats are rather lowly,
Cybermats are not too big;
Cybermats are roly-poly,
They know how to stun and garrotte and gig.
Until the Cyber order they hear
They make their toilette and take their repose:
Cybermats listen with the tiniest ear,
Cybermats watch being keen to dispose.

3.
Cybermats are silver and black,
Cybermats are of moderate size;
Cybermats jump like a jumping-jack,
Cybermats have 40 watt eyes.
They're quiet enough disabling scanners,
They're quiet enough where-ever they stray,
Renewing their ever-so internecine powers
by tapping direct to your solar array.

4.
Cybermats are plastic and light,
Cybermats (as I said) are small;
If it happens to be a stormy night
They will practise a murder or two in the hall.
If it happens the sun is shining bright
You would say there is nothing amiss in the wall:
They are resting and saving themselves to be right
For the Cybermen and the Cyber Cabal.