Tony Gallichan is Mildly Perturbed by... The BBC Doctor Who Books

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Ok. I have had enough. When they can make even a Paul Cornell book read as if it’s a junior Dr.Who book then we know that we are in trouble.

I had high hopes at the start. No. Really. I did. I thought that if the BBC was gonna take the license away from Virgin then they knew that they were on to something good and would try to make it better. Though deep inside a little voice was saying that maybe, just maybe it was another way of trying to make Who so bad that no one would care if they finished it once and for all. But I thought, no..they wouldn’t…they know how profitable its is. I was right too. BBC worldwide must have visited  Paramount and taken lessons on selling any old crap to the poor suckers who are stupid enough to actually like something they made.

So…High hopes.

Then I read the Eight Doctors

Oh Terrance.

Why?

I know you had to reintroduce the characters and concept but for heaven’s sake man…You wrote Exodus and Blood Harvest. Easy going books that were still almost unputdownable.

Nice cover though. But the typeface..oooh now, yes, the typeface, isn’t it? So cold and offputting. And the same in every book. This is known as a “Bad Thing”

But then a ray of hope. Kate Orman comes to the crease, bat raised defiantly, Jon Blum at the other end ready to form a winning partnership.

And what an opening over it was.

Vampire Science is brilliant…even the typeface doesn’t intrude that much. The doc is portrayed wonderfully. The scene where he cooks breakfast and all the trouble with the kittens…great. Super. Oh…and Eric the eternal snail. Lol

The Bodysnatchers. Hmm…. A returning foe. Professor Litefoot. Nope…it just din’t gell. And something else.

The depth of the books were getting shallower. No wonderful New Adventures soulsearching.

It caries on this way till Alien Bodies. Now I love that book. Yeeeeessss!!! I thought. Here we go. It’s gonna get better, you’ll see.

Or not as it turned out.

I've read most of the books up to the Ancestor Cell.

Why on earth destroy Gallifrey??

Was it That important? I know authors say that it was a millstobne around their necks but I don’t see how. I have a feeling that it happened because someone had the idea and others jumped on the bandwagon.

I know how fandom works. Look at the pertwee hating years. One jumps they all jump

Sheep!!!!

Lemmings!!!!

Think for yourselves for goodness sake. (though I was just as guilty when it came to the pertwee bashing)

Keith won’t have anything to do with the BBC books range. He prefers the Big Finish stuff.

And they could do with rediscovering their sense of humour.

So, The Buccaneer Chrionicles are set within the bottle universe. (Who do you think caused it to leek in the first place?)

I am trying to get some BBC stuff worked in but our Reality advisor keeps a very intense eye out for these things.

COME ON BBC BOOKS.
BUCK UP YOUR IDEAS

(I suppose I should really go and read some of the more recent ones…but money is tight and I don’t want to waste it in the hope that I’ll actually get a book I’ll enjoy)

Ok, that’s off my chest. Next time I shall be mildly perturbed by the word..
“Anorak”

 

Tony

Tony Gallichan is 72 and is suffering from Mrs. Brady-old lady syndrome.