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Excerpts from the Staggering Stories Blog:


Staggering Stories Podcast #125: The Five Word Shuffle
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 05 Feb 2012 09:59

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith and the Real Keith Dunn talk about the Big Finish Doctor Who story ‘Destination: Nerva’, consider what sort of character we might like to replace Amy, play lots of a new word game, find some general news and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro [...]


Staggering Stories Commentary #51: Primeval – Series 1, Episode 6
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 29 Jan 2012 14:54

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, superbatted, in front of ITV’s Primeval Series 1, Episode 6, and spout our usual nonsense! Nick Cutter is feeling time orphaned, Helen’s been up to no good with Stephen, Claudia’s feeling very specifically erased and Captain Ryan’s been a skeleton all along. But enough [...]


Staggering Stories Podcast #124: Holmesian High Jump
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 22 Jan 2012 11:02

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn talk about Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss’ Sherlock: Series 2, have a retrospective on the year 2011, find some general news and a variety of other stuff, specifically: 00:00 – Intro and theme tune. 00:59 — Welcome! 01:34 – News: [...]


Staggering Stories Commentary #50: Doctor Who – The Doctor, the Widow and the Wardrobe
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 15 Jan 2012 10:54

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Andy Simpkins and Keith Dunn sit down, caretakered, in front of the 2011 Doctor Who Christmas Special, The Doctor, the Widow and the Wardrobe, and spout our usual nonsense! Cyril’s got oversized specs, Reg is following the light, the King and Queen and very wooden and Amy makes the Doctor moist. [...]


Staggering Stories Podcast #123: The Head, the Predictions and the Cardboard Box
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sun, 08 Jan 2012 14:02

Summary: Adam J Purcell, Fake Keith, Jean Riddler and the Real Keith Dunn talk about the Doctor Who: ‘The Doctor, The Widow and the Wardrobe’, our Predictions, Hopes and Dreams and Fears for 2012, see how wrong we were about our Predictions for 2011, find some general news and a variety of other stuff, specifically: [...]


Mr Dalek and the Twenty Throod of Novemby
by Staggering Stories Podcast
Sat, 07 Jan 2012 19:03

This missed Christmas, so let’s instead try to fight off those New Year blues! To this end, we proudly present a new Mr Dalek Audio Adventure on our podcast feed. This exciting story, new to audio, is written by long time Mr Dalek fan, Benjamin F Elliott, and narrated by Siobhan Gallichan in the unique [...]

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Buccaneer Chronicles

The Buccaneer Chronicles:
Keeping the Peace

By Andy Simpkins (despite interference by Keith Dunn, Adam J Purcell and Tony Gallichan)


Part One - "Talk of change lately, but everything's been done before."

Second Prologue - 'Escape to Danger!'

 

The second man reclined at ease in a chair in his office. It had been appointed to him several months ago along with a new commission and advancement in rank. He was in his late thirties with an athletic build that spoke of many years of his adult life spent in the armed forces. He had dark brown hair swept back from his forehead, receding slightly and was clad in a khaki shirt and trousers. The only signs of his rank and status were the embroidered emblem on his shirt and the pips on the epaulettes of his shirt.

At that moment in time, he was looking through some reports and some of the minutiae that pre-occupy the lower ranking officers of any army of any of the civilised nations of Earth. Above him a ceiling mounted fan whirled industriously, trying in a vain attempt to dispel the all pervasive heat and humidity that was ever present in the ancient city of Jerusalem. He idly cursed the fact that air-conditioning had not been installed but he would have to grin and bear it.

He glanced at the clock on his desk and idly noted that his duty shift for that day was almost at an end. He glanced at the signed photo of Mike Yates

"Another day passes and there are no major mishaps to report. Admittedly, Pass-over is a time of great significance for the people of this city and nation but the Jewish and Moslem factions here in Jerusalem have been living in an almost easy co-existence for as long as I have been here. Hopefully, Colin, this should be a relatively easy posting for you. Another couple of months and I will be posted back to England..." He mused idly.

More frequently, however, was his attention diverted to a small photo mounted in a plain silver frame that was placed on a corner of his desk. The photo was that of a petite woman with shoulder length wavy brown hair seated on a park bench with her hands crossed in her lap. Her face had a gentle smile on it and every time he looked at it, he felt a sharp twinge of longing and desire. In the corner of the photo was written "To my dearest Colin, with all my love and kisses, Jenny xxx"

He sighed heavily and thought: "Only a couple more months and I will be back in England. I wonder how you will react when I tell you that we will be needing married persons quarters very soon..."He pulled open one of the drawers of his desk and pulled out the small plain box that lay within. Inside it was an elegantly fashioned gold ring, made by one of the goldsmiths that were so prevalent in the Moslem quarter of Jerusalem.

"I hope she will like it...Fighting disembodied life-forms, dealing with wide-spread civil disorder and with a maverick Time-Lord on the Channel Island of Jersey will seem like child's play compared to proposing to Jenny but I'm sure I will succeed in my task."

He put the ring back in its box and put it back in the drawer. He glanced at the clock again and saw that it was time to pack up and go. Just as he was about place his completed files in their relevant trays, there was an agitated knocking on the door of his office.

"Come in"

One of his more recently promoted underlings opened the door and hurried inside. He was perspiring profusely and seemed in a state of great agitation. Curtis got up and ushered the man to a vacant seat on the opposite side of his desk. He sat down and, breathing heavily and unsteadily, sat drinking at a plastic cup of water that Curtis had offered to him.

Curtis sat down in the chair opposite him, consternation etched on his features. Henderson was one of the members of the battalion of UNIT soldiers posted to his command who seemed the most calm and unflappable under pressure. He was always ready to take and carry out orders on Curtis' command and was rarely, if ever, daunted by a situation or firefight that called for his attention.

"Calm down, Henderson, for goodness sake, man. In all the time I have known you, I have never seen you like this before. Tell me what has caused this."

Henderson, having almost gained his customary composure, took a few more gulps of water and started:

"Well, sir, it was like this. Myself and several others of the battalion were guarding a group of archaeologists who were excavating that site of historic importance near to the Western Wall, or Wailing Wall, as it is more commonly known. As you know, the site is a bone of contention between Jewish and Moslem extremist factions because they both lay claim to the site as a place of extreme religious importance and therefore, both factions were none too happy at a bunch of infidel scientists poking and prodding away at, what to them, was holy ground. This fact, as well as the Jewish festival of Passover is almost upon us, has heightened tensions and small crowds from both sides have gathered at the site to generally make life as difficult for us as possible

"One of the archaeologists from Haifa University was taking echo-soundings of his and other allotted areas when he came across, what only be described, as an anomaly buried about three feet below the area that one of his students was excavating in. Naturally, this caused a great deal of excitement amongst the scientist and all his peers and we all hastened over to see what all the excitement was about.

"After a couple of hours of careful digging, the object was uncovered to a certain degree and is still in situ at the site. As soon as a few of the inhabitants saw the object, both sides immediately laid claim to the object as being an artifact important to both their religions."

Henderson paused to collect his thoughts and Curtis then said:

"Surely, if the artifact is of such historical importance to both religions, then the University of Cairo and the University of Haifa should come to an amicable agreement about who should lay claim and ownership to it...."

It was at this moment that Henderson, lost in his thoughts, immediately raised his head and stared Curtis straight in the eyes.

"Sir, the most well-versed professors from both Cairo and Haifa have both been studying the object and cannot locate it in any of their journals. It is unknown to them and sent me to seek your assistance. It is well known within our battalion that you have had 'experiences' through the course of duty that touch upon the unknown. This artefact is, in my opinion, not native to this region. In fact, I would make a tentative guess that it is of extra-terrestrial origin!"

Curtis sat in his chair, a multitude of emotions crossed over his face in an instant. Never a stranger to indecision, he pulled open one of the drawers in his desk and pulled out the holstered pistol that lay within. Pausing briefly to fit the sidearm around his waist, he said to Henderson:

"Lead me to it, I need to see this for myself...."

Inwardly, Curtis slumped." And the day had been going so well....". He bitterly thought.

 

The Device

Keeping the Peace: Chapter One